The Peacemaker

Before we conceived Zeben, when I was still trying to convince my wife that trying to conceive him would be a good idea, one of her main arguments against having another baby was how much work our current children required. Luke and Jaz would be having a hard day, fighting a lot, driving us all crazy, and she would say, "and you really want to add another one to this?" And one of my main arguments for adding another one to the mix was my theory that having a third baby would "actually make life easier. A third baby would diffuse the tension between Lukas and Jasper." While I can totally see where Lena was coming from--having toddler twins was incredibly challenging-- and while there certainly are times when having three kids does feel more overwhelming than having just two, for the most part I really think that my prediction was exactly right.

Zeben, at nearly 16 months of age, has filled his role of peacemaker quite well. This morning it was my turn to get up with the kids while Lena slept in for a couple of hours. Zeben was still sleeping when the clock switched to 7:00 (actually it was 8:00 because of the time change last night, but we'll wait a while to change the clock next to the bed), so I left his warm, snuggly body in the nest with Lena, and went downstairs with the big kids. They were having a bit of a bickery morning. None of us was all too pleased to be huddled around the table eating soggy granola, and Luke and Jaz were using their "na, na, na-na, na" tones with each other. Then, after about 45 minutes, I heard Zeb waking up on the monitor. We all ran upstairs to claim him, and everything changed after he joined our crew. Luke and Jaz became all sweet and lovely, each eager to get a smile from the baby. I nursed him and got a good dose of calming oxytocin, and none of us could help but stroke his soft, morning skin cheeks.

Now, as I write this, the three of them are playing happily together in the playroom. After agreeing not to put the Playmobil fairies in his mouth, Zeben has been granted permission to hold them and make them fly around the room. He is in heaven. And Luke and Jaz are beaming, watching Zeb enjoy the fairies seems to be even more fun than enjoying the fairies themselves.

Of course, there are other ways in which our third child is a huge help around the house. For instance, he loves to help sweep the floors (or the camera, as the case may be).



And he is excellent at putting toys back in bins and on shelves. But by far his greatest talent is the magical way in which he brings out the best in his big brothers.